Seaside

This past weekend we went on a marriage retreat with our church to Seaside. We really wanted to attend the conference and focus on our marriage, but we didn't want to leave Maddy behind because she has never been away from us and is still nursing and doesn't have anybody she knows well enough to stay behind with and not be completely traumatized at night. So we "compromised" and had my parents come down to stay with her during the day at the motel while we were at the conference. That way I could still nurse her for naptime and bedtime and she wouldn't be terrified at night. She knows my parents well enough that (at 17 months) is happy as a clam to spend the day with them and totally forget that Jason and I are not around. This plan went over GREAT with people who "get" how we have chosen to parent. People who don't get it think that we are over-protective nuts. Several of our friends lamented the fact that they don't have support people in their lives to make this happen (they just didn't get to attend the conference at all) and a few parents at the conference who left behind little babies/toddlers expressed wishes they would have had the moxie to break the mold of "leave your kids behind" and follow their hearts and make their kids (and their own sanity) a priority. Every time there was a break about fifty cell phones were whipped out to frantically check on little ones back at home. I bet they couldn't focus at all and some admitted this to me. All in the name of "getting away". Doesn't sound like fun to me! I never once had to think of Maddy or worry because I knew she was in good hands and also knew that if she needed me I could be there in one minute flat. I think there is a LOT of pressure out there to force your kids into early independence and to make the adults' needs/wants the priority. But since for most people this doesn't sit right anyway not matter how often you hear it, it forces parents to go against what is written in their hearts and causes a lot of undue anxiety for everyone. I am thankful we have my parents to count on to help us have the best of both worlds. Here are some photos of the fun they had while we were absorbing some great marriage building advice.